BEACH AT HOME: YOUR GUIDE TO A BETTER SIESTA IN 2024
Ask any French person: la sieste is a constitutional right. Along with two-hour lunches and too many national holidays, the afternoon nap is, quite simply, considered an art of living.
The French siesta is an act of defiance. Yes, mes amis, snoozing on the couch (or on the job!) counts as resistance. At this level, siestas require precision, training, and discipline. So this winter, get into uniform and step up your chill game with Vilebrequin’s latest Beach At Home collection.
BEFORE YOU BEGIN
TIME MANAGEMENT: The secret to a good siesta is knowing when to wake up. 20-30 minutes max makes you more productive, boosts creativity, and improves mood. Go ahead and add “efficient” to your LinkedIn CV.
LOCATION IS EVERYTHING: Not at your team meeting. Not during the last 20 minutes of the movie. Give siestas the attention they deserve by picking a cool, calm, notification-free spot.
DRESS FOR SUCCESS: Sleep experts recommend loose-fitting natural fibers. Cotton, silk, wool, linen, Tencel… These breathable, thermoregulating fabrics will have you asking “Chéri(e), did I snore?.” This season’s drop focuses on ultra-fluffy, addictively soft terry cloth.
DON’T MISS PRACTICE: If you want to become a world-class athlete, you have to put the hours in. On weekends or whenever you can, set aside half an hour for your health, and for yourself.
In the French siesta genre, there are three main players. Here’s everything you need to become a certified practitioner.
LA SIESTE, TOUT DE SUITE 💤
Now you’ve had your Sunday brunch, it’s time to ZzzZzzZzz. To help you slip into the arms of Morpheus at record speed, here are two of the most deliberately soporific podcasts on Earth: Sleep With Me (less fun than it sounds) and Boring Books. With bedtime stories like “The History of Bread” and “The Sears Holiday Catalogue”,dropping off shouldn’t be a problem…
Another thing that makes a siesta very… French? When the nap is just a pretext. French songstress Françoise Hardy said it best: “How about we extend our siesta? Just say the word and I’m ready. It’s your heartbeat, your kisses that interest me most.” You don’t need to tell us twice, Françoise. To set the mood, French cultural radio station France Inter has produced a podcast series of erotic readings to tickle your ears. Don’t understand French? You don’t need to. Alternatively, bring the ambiance with the ultimate French lover playlist from iconic music publication Les Inrocks. Loungewear: off.
LA SIESTE AU PARADIS
There’s a good reason why French people are always on vacation. Siestas are better in the sunshine. Turn those blue winter days into blue summer skies. Imagine your duvet is actually a giant inflatable sea turtle. Surrender to the sand(man)... We give you 7 whole hours of non-stop tropical beach sounds. Because ASMR isn’t all food, whispering, and weird tapping noises.
Calm waves. Gentle ocean breezes. And the occasional seagull. Eyes shut, gone tanning.
